The joy of a ‘perfect moment’
It is a warm Texas summer afternoon.
I just experienced such a perfect moment. I will admit, I have forgotten some of it, and had confidentially believed I would retain the entire poem in duration. Here we are.
But the moment was truly perfect. I was tucked away, under the edge of the roof of the home. Sitting on a trio of pavers my mother had picked up for our ambitious (but certainly attainable, by us) backyard project. My knees were still in the sun, and I was panicked briefly by the thoughts of skin diseases that I could potentially be screwing. And had to reassure myself with the promise of a later dousing of sunscreen. And, side bar, Past Nadi would be grateful for knowing that I just, not only doused my entire body in sunscreen, slathered it pre-emotively with Aloe Vera. Okay and, one more sidebar, friends! Take my, or don’t, completely non professional advice in recommending the near daily usage of Aloe Vera on your skin; with emphasis on that that has been sunkissed! It’s comparatively affordable, and smells really nice. Like a deeper layer in a complex upper class perfume, in a non sticky or chemically charged lightness. If you fancy yourself the hobby, or believe you could handle the work level- and in my experience, which was one of an older child, was minimal!- then you can grow your own Aloe plant in your yard, or in a large pot! They resemble a prismatic starfish, and you may potentially have a child plant! Okay sidebar over, gosh that one was long.
I was sitting with my knees out- tickled by the sun, which was directly overhead with the pace of noon. And my old lady, Shera, was laying in her usual pose just a few feet in front of me. Her pose being, a delicate sprawl, tail resting lazily on the ground beneath her, head tilted with her nose tucked to the sky. She has a bright smile on her face. Despite her age, the marks around her nose, ears, and eyes were a deep black. Her eyes were shut into perfect black slits, finally she could feel the direct heat without harming her bright blue white iris’. Her mouth was wide open and unconcerned with the possibility of bugs entering. She wasn’t concerned much of anything, the moment was perfect.
I had forgotten to bring my journal, and I was momentarily distracted by it; overcome with the desire to capture the fluidity of the world around me. I thought for a second to run inside, to grab it and to also get that sunscreen. I had been forgetful for too long, and my worries grew subconsciously by the second. I lingered. The moment was perfect.
I knew that, by getting up and retrieving my supplies to prolong this memory. To conceptualize it, for a later version of myself to find. Something to place wonder and meaning upon. I would wake Shera from her blissful daze. Turned wise by the years of Julys she has faced. The blistering heat and the quickening pace. I mean, seriously, this dog has done a twenty mile hike in her life, and that will always inspire me. Though not in the summer of course! And this summer had melted her into something so sentimental. I had melted too, the breeze, the grass, the trees, they had melted alongside us. It was a perfect moment. Its truth was beyond a recited conceptualization. I will linger on it on days less sunny; days that are eager to soak it all in.
This morning had been rough, due to the beginning of my period. Which was earlier than expected, and had left me knocked to the ground! One of the only major remedies I have found is raspberry leaf tea! It is quick for me, and alleviates the overwhelming sensation of dull sharpness. They had not had any at my local grocery store, and the closest one was a few miles out of the comfortable driving distance. I spent the morning with Shera in the sun room, her on the edge of my yoga mat and sprawled in the direct breeze of the fan. The fan had a container of ice directly in front of it, and the air was delicious. I stretched, and worked on a digital art piece I am becoming quite fond of. I’ve had a somewhat constant struggle with finding a way to ‘flow’ in my digital art. The way that it seems a lot of artists have, and how they have such incredible and thorough works. The way it just seems to make sense! I haven’t quite understood ways to fully convey that, or myself truly, in my art. And I had been practicing again on a potential OC for the July ArtFight festival, which I fear I may opt out of this year. Due to just being busy! I want to really focus on my OC work moving forward though, because today I truly felt I had found my footing in working on the piece! And I sipped on a hibiscus raspberry tea, which I hoped would work as a substitute. And it did, and I felt a bit lighter about the day.
Earlier in the morning, pre-hibiscus raspberry tea, I was experiencing cramping that made it difficult to look at my phone, or any screen. All I could do was play my ultimate grounding playlist. Which is actually just the entire discography to three alternating artists. And lay with my head on the stuffed animal I slept with each night of the last few months. It has been my partner’s for years, and feels to me like the popular image of “Too Much Love.” But it feels quite loved enough, in actuality. It feels like a nest to land in. And think.
I thought about what I could do for myself at that moment. And what I hoped for from the day. I had canceled an earlier priority, due to the symptoms of my cycle, and felt really bad about it. But it is perfectly okay to not be available! Especially when it is something entirely unpredictable and relentless. I did not want to throw myself away for the day, even with the promise of a fresh tomorrow.
It was nice to feel that compassion, regardless of anything external. And the day has only gotten better! Today will be incredible, and my partner just walked into the room. It has essentially been confirmed as a guarantee :)!
